If you know me, you would know that I am quite skeptical about alternative healing methods for mental health. Sign me up for an ice-skating session, sure. Skiing, never tried before, sure. Anything that is interesting, like art therapy or a type of sport which I have never tried before. Chakras, singing bowls, natural healing methods, not my cup of tea.
I am so sick and tired of having crying and anger outbursts. I had a threw a tantrum at my father due to a family dispute with him. I self-harmed and then I was being uncooperative a few days later when he wanted to have dinner as a family. After that, I had a meltdown and I actually ran away from home and I drank a lot of alcohol. Every time I get little bursts of happiness, I will start to feel it crashing down again, and somehow something happens which triggers me into a downward spiral.
You often hear news stories of loners. Loners going on a shooting rampage. Loners killing themselves. Everyone has their preconceived ideas and label other people as such. I hear things like:”This boy is a loner, but he can speak well on stage.”, or “We didn’t know what happened to him. He was a nice and quiet boy, he didn’t have many friends, but he decided to do XXX”.
I have been quite busy recently. I think I am venturing out of my comfort zone again because this time I went to a haunted house at Bukit Gombak CC.
Recovery might mean the person with mental health issues becoming a brand new person. His or her interests may have changed. But I haven’t changed. I am still sensation-seeking, adventurous, spunky and weird. However, I notice that I used to like concrete and tangible items, such as bags, and clothing. However, nowadays, I go for experiences and knowledge, things which are less tangible in nature.
Maybe I should be more random and blog about weird dreams and anything that comes to mind, like Xia Xue. So here it goes. I also have some depression poems and new stuff, but it’s quite dark and all, so I shall leave it aside for now.
So I found this new café, and the food there looks very appetising and visually appealing. I am going to try out the Halloween menu with my friend today, and fingers crossed. 😡
Claire recently blogged about how Singapore is the capital of education and anxiety. I have to agree with her, I have been quite busy, and stressed.
This poses a lot of questions in relation to mental health. Is our self-worth dependent on our IQ or our abilities? Will eugenics take over the world? How will eugenics affect mental health in the future? Where is the line drawn when it comes to ethics? How far would we go to alter or modify ourselves to fit the ideal body type or figure? It doesn’t get worse than this. Uncanny valley doesn’t get worse than this! This is literally the valley of valleys.
I had become a monster, and I pushed everyone away, whether friends or foes. I felt quite ashamed that I had a misunderstanding with a friend, and as a result, I actually left a meetup much earlier than expected without saying a word, because said friend was there.
My anxiety has been quite bad recently, I had to take a valium pill for these past two days. I keep having the 21st birthday dream, where I tried to organise a 21st birthday party, but somehow, something would crop out and nothing would work out. I wished my own birthday was more grand, posher and more lavish but now it’s too late. I am not 21 anymore.
Please let me out of this dark, scary place, i’m being torn apart at the seams, i am being shackled by your chains. My inner demons are tormenting me, it’s eating me from inside out, i want the good ol’ days back. I just want to get through the day, the lights are flickering more, the walls are closing up even further, i can’t breathe, i’m going to hyperventilate.
Excoriation disorder is a disorder whereby the sufferer feels the compulsive urge to pick at his or her own skin. Common places for skin picking include the scalp, shoulders, hands etc.
Thus, I think I may appear high functioning, or I seem like I am doing okay when I am actually not. In reality, I feel that I am quite low functioning. I have huge employment and education gaps. That’s why I am writing this. I feel that I am lagging behind my peers, and I feel that I may not be able to find suitable employment in the future, so I don’t feel like I stand to lose by writing this.
He mentioned that he felt that things were too heavy for him, and there was a lot of emotional baggage in his mind, and he needed to release it. He stood in solidarity with his fans, showing that he has been dealing with a lot of issues.
I didn’t want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that’s really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you’re so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare. ― Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story
When we entered the mirror maze, it felt like a psychedelic drug-fuelled acid trip, which wasn’t a good thing, in my mind. We had to use our pool noodles to help us feel our way through the mirror maze, as we might knock into the mirrors accidentally. There were many dead-ends and your own reflection would stare back at you from multiple mirrors.
For some of you, you might be familiar with Over the Rainbow, a non-profit organisation which aims to help those with mental health issues. SG Creations is a subsidiary of Over the Rainbow, and they are showing 3 original films for members of the public to watch, with the aim of destigmatising mental health issues, under their media literacy project “Hot Off The Press”.
If you stay up at night, tossing and turning in bed, contemplating all the what-ifs, I feel you. If you hide in the toilet, shaking with fear and anxiety, I feel you. If you prefer to stay in the comfort of your house and not venture out, I feel you. Because every step feels like a thousand miles.
Self-care is important. You have to take care of yourself. Your doctor and therapist can only do so much to help you. You have to take little steps to work towards recovery, and help yourself by avoiding your triggers. It is really not easy. Sometimes you may lapse into the whirlpool of negativity or you might still hallucinate.
According to Oxford dictionary online, ghosting is defined as “the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.” The article talks about how some friendships turn awkward or sour, and neither party is willing to reconcile their differences, so they end up parting ways.
Hey guys! Recently I went to Thailand with my mum, and you could call it a sabbatical, a holiday, or whatever you call it. We returned home after 1 day in Thailand. We had received news that there was a bombing in Thailand, about 0.8km from our hotel. My mum was very scared and she was panicking, almost on the verge of a panic attack. She told me that I should have listened to my gut instincts and her sixth sense. But hindsight is only 20/20.
You may need a referral to see a mental health professional, if you are feeling stressed out, depressed or having unusual experiences, and it is affecting your day to day life. You can either get a referral from a polyclinic, or directly book an appointment with the clinic or hospital.
Schizophrenia is one of the most debilitating and severe mental disorders, with a very high disease burden. According to the Singapore Burden of Disease study, mental disorders were responsible for 6.9% of the total disease and injury burden in Singapore in 2010, with more than one-third of this burden (39%) from schizophrenia and one-fourth (25%) from anxiety & depression. It was ranked 10th on the Disability-Adjusted Life Year, which is the number of years lost to a healthy life.
You may wonder, what has mental health got to do with gaming? Today, I just found out that Runescape has a mental health event in-game, and I was so pleasantly surprised. In case you didn’t know, Runescape has been supporting mental health charities over the years, and it aims to raise $150,000 this year, for Prince’s Trust and CPL Mind, as well as YMCA’s Right Here.
Sometimes, you never know how deep the hole can go. I never knew it either, but apparently, when you think you are really depressed and you can’t go any lower, life says: “you know what? Let’s go 3 floors lower.” What I would love to do, is to escape the recesses of my own mind. The birthplace and labyrinth of new ideas and new creations, but also my worst enemy as well. Introversion is a personality trait for some people, and they like it this way, but I think introversion has turned itself against me.
Beautiful by Christina Aguilera – This is one of the more popular songs about depression/low self-esteem and bullying. Christina Aguilera’s dark and heavy vocals add weight to the song, with a tinge of sadness. “Words can’t bring you down/Don’t you bring me down today” tells us that words can’t hurt us. However, hurtful or negative words might become etched in our memory forever, ambushing us when we least expect it.
“Imagine you had a dog, and suddenly you had to put it to sleep after 10 years of caring for it. How would you feel?” That’s the analogy used in Every Brillant Thing, a play by Bhumi Productions, used to describe a person who was lost to suicide. An audience member was asked to re-enact a scene as a vet using euthanasia to put the protagonist’s dog to sleep.
Allow me to quote a quote by Jim Mahoney. “I wish people knew that taking one’s life can feel like sneezing to a severely depressed person, that it can be a mere reaction to the body’s overwhelming message, that after fighting a sneeze for years and years, some people simply can’t sneeze anymore, that they should not be condemned or demonized for sneezing.” – Jim Mahoney
What if your mum was hospitalised in a hospital for a suicide attempt? What would you do? For Johnny Donahoe, he decided to write down a list of things which were worth living for.