Mentally ill have a bigger difficulty in employment than others

No free pass for mental illness

My mind is quite jumbled up right now. I am on Epilim (stupid name man) and Fluoxetine right now. I stopped the Olanzapine. Sometimes, I think I have cognitive decline, as I can barely string together a coherent sentence, yet sometimes, I am functioning well cognitively, and I can be eloquent too. I am trying to collect my thoughts, and maybe the Olanzapine helped me organise my thoughts better? There are so many events I want to attend, yet, they might not be that interesting after all, so I am hesitant. Also, school is starting so I need to learn […]

Fear of failure

Life is a gamble

Everything in life, to me, is a gamble. Taking exams is a gamble, you might do well or you might fail. Making friends is a gamble, you might get ignored or ostracised, or you might develop a blossoming friendship with someone. Anxiety has stopped me from doing so many things. After the passing of the late Chester Bennington, his ardent fans hashtagged: #fuckdepression. That is not to say that depression does not exist or dismiss the plight of those who suffer from depression. It is facing the monster in its face and saying fuck you. It is so badass and […]

Recovering From Mental Illnesses Alone

I’ll Do It For You

The road to recovery is not easily traversed alone. But it is too often that those with mental illnesses end up in a state of loneliness, only to find themselves looking for a way to get better, for everyone around them cannot fathom a way to help them. Maybe they cannot even fathom mental illnesses as a whole. Many times a positive and supportive environment can do more than medicine can ever do. I’ve mentioned how stigma affects recovery but I am often torn by the selfishness behind recovering for someone else.

Workplace Environment Affects Depression

The workplace, not the workload, causes workplace depression

Singapore has been known to have a very muted and conservative work environment, causing undue stress that might carry over to the individual’s lives. A new Danish study concludes that the often misunderstood correlation between workload and depression can be instead attributed to an improper workplace environment. With the culture that has been built in big companies in Singapore, it is beneficial to relook at how we treat work as a concept and our employees.

Eating Disorders Awareness

REFLECTIONS 2018 – Eating Disorders Awareness Week

Tailored is a new mental health initiative set up by 2 eating disorder survivors in recovery. It aims to promote mental wellness through support groups such as their “Eating Disorders Recovery Programme”. They have an alteray endeavour session once every two weeks, which aims to help connect individuals with lived experience with Eating Disorders and help them develop their artistic ability and talents as well as to inspire individuals. They also provide bullet journals, caregiver toolkits and wellness boxes for mental health and self-care needs.

Panic Attacks

Panic Attacks Wait For No One

Your stomach drops. You feel the blood rush to your neck, forehead and limbs. They start to warm up. You feel light headed and it is as if you are falling towards the floor you will never hit. Your hands start to tremble. Your ears start to ring and your vision becomes blurry. The energy in your body leaves as if it is a spirit that was banished. Your breathing quickens and your breath becomes shallower. The world is ending and you are about to die.

Sleep Affecting Mental Health

Earlier School Start Times May Increase Risk of Adolescent Depression and Anxiety According to URMC

Considering the schooling environment in Singapore, sleep and school start times have been a hot topic issue. School start times and school workload can often be correlated to poorer quality sleep and the subsequent degradation of performance in school, as well as affecting mental health in students. The University of Rochester Medical Center published a study that implies school start time having an effect on sleep and mental health symptoms.

Discrimination in hiring practices

First World Country Lacking Disability Employment Legislation

As an employer, you can follow these principles to adopt fair employment practices: Recruit and select employees on the basis of merit (such as skills, experience or ability to perform the job), regardless of age, race, gender, religion, marital status and family responsibilities, or disability. – Tripartite Alliance for Fair and Progressive Employment Practices (TAFEP)

The Mental Health Inaction Plan

The Mental Health Inaction Plan

In my most recent posts, I investigate how much we do for mental health as a society. However, I wanted to look one step further into education and the education system. For a system that prides itself on producing many bright students and the number of students who manage to go to JC, Polytechnic and Universities, one thing we are still greatly lacking is the proper education for those beyond the books – mental health and well-being. My investigations show exactly that, and sadly, this result did not come as a surprise.

Logan Paul Discounts Mental Health

Trivialising Suicide & Current Affairs

Recently, a YouTuber by the name of Logan Paul posted a video of his trip to Japan’s Suicide Forest. This forest is a place where the stressed and suicidal go to end their lives. In this video of his, he shows a man hanging from a tree, laughs at the body and makes snarky comments about how the man must have committed suicide recently, due to the colour of his skin.

Psychotic Episode

A dream about a psychotic episode

I don’t want a mental health diagnosis because there is a lot of stigma and ramifications involved. Not being able to apply for insurance. Job discrimination. Taking you very seriously. Taking you so seriously that you are too serious that you have to be in an ambulance, that sort of thing.


Back after a hiatus

I do not identify as a depressive anymore. If someone asked me how I would describe myself, I would tell them that I am a depressive. But now, I think I identify as a clubber or an LGBT member. I thought I had kicked my depressive tantrums to the curb already. My father threatened to send me to IMH forever because I kept throwing tantrums and I really couldn’t help it.


The Endless Cycle of Grief & Mourning

SHINee lead singer and K-Pop star Kim Jong-hyun, better known by his stage name Jonghyun, died Monday evening in what police are investigating as a possible suicide. He was 27. “Please let me go. Tell me I did well. Final farewell,” the texts read, according to the Yonhap news agency. This is the second major celebrity suicide on my radar, after Chester Bennington earlier in the year.

Too Poor for Mental Illness

Too Poor For Mental Illness

How can a country that prides itself on healthcare policies view mental illness as a second or third priority? What I hope for is the day mental illness is treated with the same importance and seriousness as any other illness. Mental illness is, after all, a brain disorder.

Crowded MRT Train

Leaving the mentally ill behind

We see sights like the one above on the train. It almost becomes parts of our daily routine. I was a commuter on the train recently, on my way to many different job interviews. These two issues etched a thought in my mind: (1) How many people I see out and about suffer from some form of mental illness?; and (2) Am I going to face the same stigma because I am ill?


How we shame the mentally ill into a lonely recovery

To say that mental health and mental illnesses are plagued by stigma is a gross understatement. Yet, after one of the most successful decades into looking at neurology, we still see poor mental health and mental illness as a form of personal weakness and indulgence. This stigma that we put on people (or even ourselves) could shame them or others into not seeking treatment. Even if they do seek treatment, they can go through a nightmarish lonely recovery.

Sick & tired

I am sick and tired

I am so sick and tired of having crying and anger outbursts.  I had a threw a tantrum at my father due to a family dispute with him. I self-harmed and then I was being uncooperative a few days later when he wanted to have dinner as a family.  After that,  I had a meltdown and I actually ran away from home and I drank a lot of alcohol. Every time I get little bursts of happiness, I will start to feel it crashing down again, and somehow something happens which triggers me into a downward spiral.

On Medication

[Repost] In Love & On Medication

The first time my boyfriend hid my nearly empty packet of Alprazolam (an anti-anxiety drug that is commonly known as Xanax, and acts as a minor tranquilizer) and my brand new packet of Sertraline (an SSRI-type anti-depressant that is commonly known as Zoloft), I wanted to kill him. And, if I’m being honest, also myself.


Bullying and ostracism, and caring too much

You often hear news stories of loners. Loners going on a shooting rampage. Loners killing themselves. Everyone has their preconceived ideas and label other people as such. I hear things like:”This boy is a loner, but he can speak well on stage.”, or “We didn’t know what happened to him. He was a nice and quiet boy, he didn’t have many friends, but he decided to do XXX”. 

Art as a form of therapy

Depression as an art form

Recovery might mean the person with mental health issues becoming a brand new person. His or her interests may have changed. But I haven’t changed. I am still sensation-seeking, adventurous, spunky and weird. However, I notice that I used to like concrete and tangible items, such as bags, and clothing. However, nowadays, I go for experiences and knowledge, things which are less tangible in nature.

People Talking

Weird Dream and Thinking

Maybe I should be more random and blog about weird dreams and anything that comes to mind, like Xia Xue. So here it goes. I also have some depression poems and new stuff, but it’s quite dark and all, so I shall leave it aside for now.